Sven & Kille's Cat Blog

Cat Fashion Police: 2013 Emmys Red Carpet Purration

Sven and I are enjoying are the new CAT FASHION POLICE as a part-time purration project. As fashion is catty, we feel it's ideal if the non -fashion educated ciataches get rated by educated fashion cats (ahem, like us). Let's kick off with the worst dressed, as we don't have time for selfies.

 

 

 

WORST DRESSED 

Heidi Klum

Red hotness in Versace - yes, I purr as an alpha male cat for tight and sexy frocks when a sexy woman can wear anything... so why this? Purrating this as a 6.

Meowza! How did she breathe & slink along in that Versace tightness?  If I were Heidi's boyfriend I would insist on her in Givenchy, not Vertraschy. Purrating as a 7.

 

 

Claire Danes

Purration ferociousness... what were you thinking?! We love Armani Prive, but I  was so distracted from your talent and felined kindness, and focused on your cleavage and unflattering neckline. Purrating as a 5.

I like the low sheer neckline, at least she has real b***s and not the fakes. Armani Prive is the best for her as she would look ferociously bad in all the other designers that all the red carpet ciatchy reviewers favor. Purrating as a 6.

January Jones

As she is part-actress and part-A-list-fashionista, we purred for her to slink out in Balenciaga or Chanel... if only team Givenchy would have been a bit kinder and designed a sexier dress. Fashion is so ciatchy and political; I would consider this to be a fashion backstab. Purrating as a 4.

Grrrowl... team Givenchy needs a cat scratch! What happened to your red carpet designing skills? We have seen Rooney Mara and many others wearing better. January got the purratingly bad dress. Not her fault. Purrating as a 7 (for her humility to wear it).

 

 

BEST DRESSED 

Anna Gunn

Purring with class and purrfect style! Good job Anna, for not looking overly fashionized by a bad team. And you won for your role in Breaking Bad! I purrate your Romana Keveza gown as a 10!

Hot and purrfectly classy, we kissed the TV screen when you won as not many looked as purrfect. Nice fit, no desparate housewife cleavage falling out of THE bodice. Purrating as a 10!

 

 

 

 

Zooey Deschanel

Fancy that fit Zooey, keeping up with RTW trends without looking overstyled. Meowza, did you need help out of that hot dress by J. Mendel? Purrating as a 10.

How did she slink along to chat with our journalistic red carpet competition (Ryan Seacrest)? Didn't know that J. Mendel could cut such a fitted purrfectly felined dress! Can we visit his studio to analyze? I purrate this as an 8, but only since I can't hide under your skirt and slink along the red carpet with you.

Kate Mara

Meowza Kate, I remember from your fitting in our apartment last year that you like cats and I chose your clutch. J. Mendel cut another red carpet purrfection. You are a purrfect 10 (and a very sweet lady).

I tried to steal her mega-diamond options during the fitting last year, but the rings were too large to hide. Purration - she is too cute and looks 200% purrfect in the J. Mendel frock, though it's sadly another skirt I can't hide under. Kate is a purrfect fashionista - did you know she often styles herself? Purrating as a 10!

 

Sarah Paulson

That ferociously deep-cut neckline was purrfection. Carolina Herrera doesn't often cut a gown so deep and sexy... this is breakthrough. Sarah, you looked meowza hot! Purating as a 10.

 

She looks very felined and purrfect. We watch her show American Horror Story and to be purrfectly honest, it's one of the best-cut frocks at the Emmys! So take that Just Jared - you're not a cat! Purating as a 10.

Cat Fashion Police: Red Carpet Faux Paws

 

Meowzers... how do Golden Globe and Oscar nominee actresses walk out the door for a Red carpet event looking like they raided Britney Spear's back up dancers closets? Joan Rivers needs to fine their style team for bad sourcing. Fashion faux paw to the max - who let them out the door? Or told them they look purrfect ? They need a fashion police paw out! Ladies, we have seen you looking purrfect... what happened?

 

 

Amanda Seyfried is overcome by "Dancing with the Stars" blues?

 

 

 

Anne Hathaway pairs her new gown with old "Catwoman" heels? Karl where were you during this fitting? This look needs a 911 CHANEL rescue.

 

 

 

Jessica Biel - I purr for long chiffon gowns but this is more like "Bollywood" gone "Wrongwood".

 

 

 

Nicole Kidman is possibly auditioning for the remake of My Fair Lady... sometimes getting into character should be left in the closet.

 

 

 

Jennifer Aniston... we know you have a purated high budget to sculpt those arms, cheekbones, hair and legs. What happened to the styling budget?

 

 

 

Naomi Watts... are you in Kylie Minogue's dress by mistake? Meowza! I thought I was purating the MTV Music Video awards when I saw this.

 

 

Cat Fashion Police: Sven and Kille's Weekly Review

 

Lady Gaga? Is that you? I thought Halloween was next week? I'm costume shopping and this isn't inspiring me as the wicked witch is in OZ not in Yves Saint Laurent...I'll check in on Madge maybe she's wearing something I could copy for my Halloween look. I can't even purrate this look.

 

 

I wish she would wear a dress made of smoked salmon as I'd carry her bag for the odd bite off the hem. But hey if she lost the hat it might make the cut. I purrate this as a 2 out of 10.

 

 

 

 

Bella Heathcote's heels work as they are hairy and look like something I'd sleep in or on, not to meowza on the dress as it looks like she bought it last min at JC Penny. Disappointing as she is a hottie and should style herself... this is a fashion tragedy.

 

 

I saw those heels in our office! I think Mom used them on a shoot, but I've not seen a dress like that on a model or actress, what happened Bella? We purr about about you and hope you'll pop by for tea and we can advise a better selection or at least buy you a gift card to shop at Stella McCartney or Balenciaga for your next red carpet appearance.

 

 

 

So this froggie hotness actress Marion Cotillard is in with Dior like I'm in with chicken Greenies and she is wearing Azzuro? Better than Bella but not only can we see up your skirt from our POV, but not sure this look brings out your Dior froggie hotness. 3 out 10

 

 

 

Marion looks like she is dying for that skirt to fly up or she got bored with sexy fitted dresses that are purrfect rather than this frumpy non sexy frock. Only advantage is if I were live on the carpet interviewing her I could review her underwear as well as the dress, where as Ryan Seacrest is still a bit too tall to do that. 3 out of 10

 

 

 

Leigh Lezark is always Meowza #1 on my list of best dressed for any event, I'm crazy for those long couture gowns as I'd love to nap under the hem... So I'm dreaming that one day Leigh will wear a long CHANEL gown in which I can lounge under while Sven interviews her. She's the #1 Meowza 10 out of 10

 

 

This lady has untouchable or in my case - unlickable style and beauty. Wish she was shorter, my height so I could attempt to chat her up. I Like that she keeps her make up and hair natural and has the purrfect sense of style... funny she 's not on staff at Conde Nast or V Mag or starring in a vampire film? 10 out 10

 

 

Cat Fashion Police: Sven and Kille's Red Carpet Watch

 

For the record, Sven and I are often home alone with the TV on. Mom leaves the classical station running until one of us changes the channel. Not too long ago there was some show called the Prime-time EMMYS, and we both remember our mom fitting Steve Carell and some other nominees when we spent more time in LA. As gowns, jewelry and heels pass through our apt/office weekly we are tired of not having a say on what we like. It's always the actress or actor's opinion vs our moms. So here's our chance to have our voice!

 

 

She hosts Fashion Police on E! so here's what I'm saying Kelly O: next time get a hot dress that isn't in the same palette as your hair color. Otherwise, a 7 on a scale of 10.

 

 

 

 

I don't mind the mauve, the fabric is a bit too over the top couture, but I like the fit... her skirt would be hard to nap under with all those bloody tight layers... Meow.

 

 

 

 

 

Blindingly hot... Meowza, I purr for Lucy Liu to be fitted in my mom's apartment!!! But this dress... seriously? Nice fit, but unless I need to stare at her cleavage to check my nose shine, it's a bit too editorial. She can go softer.

 

 

What? I like it she is attracting heat, a reflection of everything including those you mentioned who can check their lipstick via her cleavage mirror. It's a 2 for one look, she must be in great shape as I'm sure it weighs more than us and or more than the statue up for grabs later that night.

 

 

 

 

Zosia hit it out of the ball park here: purrfect style and fit! She needs to pop by for cat nip tea and get styled in ContentMode ASAP - she has the same taste as our editors. This Bibhu Mohapatra gown is hot, sexy and virgin like , you know she's still a virgin when I watch her on TV.

 

 

What a hot virgin like that with red carpet style, oh yeah she's that fun neurotic character on HBO's Girls, right? When did you say she was popping by? Purrfect gown! Gets a 10 out of 10 from me! The skirt is flowy and soft enough to crawl under nap and or just chill out as I do have a feline fetish for silk gown hemlines. Nice to lay under and peak me head out to view through a shaded veil of luxury.