Sven and I are enjoying are the new CAT FASHION POLICE as a part-time purration project. As fashion is catty, we feel it's ideal if the non -fashion educated ciataches get rated by educated fashion cats (
ahem, like us). Let's kick off with the worst dressed, as we don't have time for selfies.
WORST DRESSED
Heidi Klum
Red hotness in Versace - yes, I purr as an alpha male cat for tight and sexy frocks when a sexy woman can wear anything... so why
this? Purrating this as a 6.
Meowza! How did she breathe & slink along in that Versace tightness? If I were Heidi's boyfriend I would insist on her in Givenchy, not Vertraschy. Purrating as a 7.
Claire Danes
Purration ferociousness... what were you thinking?! We love Armani Prive, but I was so distracted from your talent and felined kindness, and focused on your cleavage and unflattering neckline. Purrating as a 5.
I like the low sheer neckline, at least she has real b***s and not the fakes. Armani Prive is the best for her as she would look ferociously bad in all the other designers that all the red carpet ciatchy reviewers favor. Purrating as a 6.
January Jones
As she is part-actress and part-A-list-fashionista, we purred for her to slink out in Balenciaga or Chanel... if only team Givenchy would have been a bit kinder and designed a sexier dress. Fashion is so ciatchy and political; I would consider this to be a fashion backstab. Purrating as a 4.
Grrrowl... team Givenchy needs a cat scratch! What happened to your red carpet designing skills? We have seen Rooney Mara and many others wearing better. January got the purratingly bad dress. Not her fault. Purrating as a 7 (for her humility to wear it).
Purring with class and purrfect style! Good job Anna, for not looking overly fashionized by a bad team. And you won for your role in
Breaking Bad! I purrate your Romana Keveza gown as a 10!
Hot and purrfectly classy, we kissed the TV screen when you won as not many looked as purrfect. Nice fit, no desparate housewife cleavage falling out of THE bodice. Purrating as a 10!
Zooey Deschanel
Fancy that fit Zooey, keeping up with RTW trends without looking overstyled. Meowza, did you need help out of that hot dress by J. Mendel? Purrating as a 10.
How did she slink along to chat with our journalistic red carpet competition (Ryan Seacrest)? Didn't know that J. Mendel could cut such a fitted purrfectly felined dress! Can we visit his studio to analyze? I purrate this as an 8, but only since I can't hide under your skirt and slink along the red carpet with you.
Kate Mara
Meowza Kate, I remember from your fitting in our apartment last year that you like cats and I chose your clutch. J. Mendel cut another red carpet
purrfection. You are a purrfect 10 (and a very sweet lady).
I tried to steal her mega-diamond options during the fitting last year, but the rings were too large to hide. Purration - she is too cute and looks 200% purrfect in the J. Mendel frock, though it's sadly another skirt I can't hide under. Kate is a purrfect fashionista - did you know she often styles herself? Purrating as a 10!
Sarah Paulson
That ferociously deep-cut neckline was purrfection. Carolina Herrera doesn't often cut a gown so deep and sexy... this is breakthrough. Sarah, you looked meowza hot! Purating as a 10.
She looks very felined and purrfect. We watch her show
American Horror Story and to be purrfectly honest, it's one of the best-cut frocks at the Emmys! So take
that Just Jared - you're not a cat! Purating as a 10.
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